The term “imagined memoir” stuck out for me from one of our last calls. This made me think of my grandmothers whom I have never met – they both died before I was born.
I went to visit my mom last Tuesday with the specific purpose of asking her stories about her life, her mother, her family life, upbringing, etc.
She was quite open and honest about her mom, which I had never heard before. It was really nice to be able to connect with her in a different way. She mentioned my grandmother’s hobbies such as bowling, bridge, dancing, and playing piano. She mentioned how her father sexually assaulted her and she thinks that’s what fuelled her alcoholism. She mentioned that my grandmother began binge-drinking when my mom was about ten years old. This would happen monthly – about one week of binge-drinking followed by vomiting and being locked in her room and then maybe one or two weeks of ‘normalcy’ and then the cycle repeated.
My mom mentioned my grandmother died of cancer – first breast and then it went into her spine. She mentioned she went to Japan as an airline stewardess and brought her mom back a pearl ring – one of the few nice things she had, she said.
When she was in the hospital she brought her a watch that fit her wrist – she began to cry as she said this. Her mother recognized that she was trying to help her and take care of her this whole time.
where rivers are born 